Here is my dilemma. If I feel that I'm not doing enough for Lillian, did I completely fail in raising Katie and Charlie? No, I know the answer is No. But, now I'm thinking that I never did so much with the two oldest like I have with Lillian. That's what is making me feel horrible.
I guess I never knew how much I took for granted.
I know going forward, I will make sure to pay special attention to all their needs, whatever they may be. And to make sure, that they each get my undivided attention (well, most of it). After all, they're still young children and have a lot of growing to do. So, hopefully the damage hasn't set in!
You come across as a great mama to me. We all have different styles, y'know? Look me me, I only have ONE kid. If I had 3, woohoo! I wouldn't have time to shower on a daily basis, let along blog. Trust me. I know myself. ;-)
ReplyDeleteAlso, I can imagine what it would feel like if I had other children before Malea. If I had, maybe I'd be more relaxed and not have all these FTM jitters.
BTW, I think I suck at this mom thing. To be perfectly honest. I am so winging it. We must all have those moments, huh?
Sounds to me like you are doing a great job. Why are we mamas so hard on ourselves??? I do the same thing. Give yourself a big hug...you're doing wonderfully!!!
ReplyDeleteI am so with you on that! I often feel like I'm not doing enough for my little one too. It was so different with my first "typical" son. I could just let him do his thing, ya know. I'm not really a high-energy, go go go, super organized person, so I struggle with all the therepy, appointments, etc. sometimes too. It sounds to me like your doing a fine job. The fact that you worry about it just shows you're a great loving mom who cares about her kids, and really thats the most important thing.
ReplyDeleteYou are an amazing mama and your thoughtfulness with which you write this blog shows how truly loving you are and this is the greatest gift you can give your children. Your love. So no matter what, our children know we are human and that we are learning and just trying to do the best that we can. You are awesome!
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