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January 26, 2009

About being a Submariner's Wife

Kinda spent the day searching and reading other blogs and decided to see how many Submariner Wife blogs were out there.  I found a lot and they were all interesting enough to read too.  Yeah, I think being a submariners wife is different.  I think it's cool :)  But sometimes it so DAMN hard!!!  FYI, yes there are Submariners serving in Iraq and Afghanistan!  Crazy huh...I always thought that I wouldn't have to worry about my husband going off to war, but just because he's a bubblehead doesn't mean they won't give him a gun!

Well, I found this "You know you're..." on a lot of the blogs and thought I would share with my blogging friends. much of this is TRUE!!!

You know you're a submariner's wife if....

1. You use the words poopie suit, duty, head, cover, O dark thirty and field day in a non perverse way on a daily basis.

2. You lost count of the number of times you've been on board "The world's most powerful warship"

3. You know what time the mid watch is.

4. You've stayed awake during the mid watch to talk to your husband on the phone.

5. You've eaten in crews mess and wonder how they could mess up a salad.

6. You've super glued, ironed on, or velcroed a patch onto a uniform.(or conned the local seamstress to make it right by tomorrow and she gets double the price)

7. You've lived in any or all of the following cities; Norfolk,Va Kingsland, GA, Groton, CT, Bangor, WA, Saratoga, NY.

8. You think day after duty is a special holiday.

9. You know the difference between a mini day, liberty after field day and fast cruise.

10. You're husband has ever uttered the words "I'm not at liberty to say".

11. You can pack a sea bag in under 10 minutes.

12. You know what a TLD, LES, and TVQ are, but you don't know what the letters stand for.

13. You've stood on the beach/pier despite snow, rain, or sand gnats to watch the boat pull in.

14. Anything less than 30 days doesn't really count as a patrol.

15. The other crew/division always get the better deal.

16. You know at least 10 guys you would consider friends of the family and yet you still don't know their first name.

17. You send emails religiously to a system you know is broken.

18. You expect an email everyday from a system you know is broken.

19. You've spent more months of your marriage apart than you have together.

20. You've actually grown to like sleeping alone despite the fact you know you are married and he will possibly share that bed 110 days of 365.

21. You use a phone tree.

22. You have your ombudsman's number programmed into your phone only because “something might happen and she is your only contact that can successfully reach the captain”

23. You know what "boat smell" is.

24. You know what month it changes from dress whites to dress blues and back again.

25. You give him a kiss and a smile when you drop him off at the turn styles and wonder why surface fleet entries aren’t the same.
(and then cry the rest of the way home)

26. You know what it means when your child says “daddy has duty ..again?? and proceed to take all their frustrations out on you”.

27.You know the difference between 3 section and 4 section duty.

28. You’re strong enough to say ‘No honey, go out in port , enjoy yourself, you deserve it" and patiently wait thru the 20 hour difference in time zones to tell him your child puked all over you during the 10 hr wait in the naval hospital emergency room.

29. You can honestly accept phone calls, snail mail and web-cams are purely a surface fleet luxury.

30. You have told a creditor “No really, I don’t have power of attorney because he had to work every day until O dark 30 for 6 weeks prior to this deployment but if you want your money you better tell me what the problem is “.

31.You look at your cat or dog as a “Partner in life”

32. You’ve listened to a surface fleet wife say “it’s been 2 days and I haven’t heard anything from him” and you wanted to punch her.

33. You have asked the toilet “Why do you do this every time he leaves”
(and the air conditioner, the garage door opener, and the dryer......etc.)

34. You’ve told your boss after the school calls “You just don’t get it….I’m a single parent regardless of the fact I am wearing a wedding band and the DNA tests proved it is his baby too”

35. You have told your child’s therapist “ You’re kidding, who would have thought ?“( after a diagnosis of separation anxiety and lack of communication).

36. You go in debt after convincing yourself that spending money in the 6 months of silence is justified regardless of the fact they were “on a mission”.

37. You check your email every 10 minutes by hitting the send and receive button convincing yourself it has to be the server.

38. Your local blockbuster employees know you by name and talk about how you have no life with your excessive online/in–store rentals not to mention how many times you say “if your daddy was here you would’nt be acting like this” !!!

39.You continue to miss and love the absent best friend and husband you know that endures the bare minimum of life’s luxuries to keep his family and this country safe.

40. You have accepted the fact that no one will ever understand the loneliness, pain and suffering your heart endures no matter how much they say “ I can imagine what it must feel like”

41. Your husband/mate keeps a watch that counts down his time until shore duty/EOS to the second.

42. You spend a majority of the time answering “ I don’t know” to the following questions “when will he be home” Will you make it for the wedding” Can we book the hotel rooms for you now? ”Will you be here for the family reunion” “Will you make it to see us this year”??

43. You know the homecoming in a submariner’s life is the one thing that makes it justified. And for me, no matter how much I may curse the sight of that boat or hate the smell, when I see it coming up the river or smell my husband home from sea....there is nothing sweeter.

44. The thought of homecoming sex brings a big smile to your face.


  1. Though I was a submariner's girlfriend and then wife (for about 8 months before the lateral transfer was official), and know many of the things in this list, I still can't say that I know how it feels like you do.

    It's absolutely difficult and I give you so many props.

  2. Thanks Chrystal. I think that being a wife/husband to someone in the military is always difficult...but of course I favor the Sub force :)

  3. Haha, those are soooo true. I guess I'm official, eh? :)

  4. LOL!! I like that! Im not a wife...yet! But I here you!

  5. I am a submariner girlfriend and all this is new...but reading this, I can feel you on having to tell everyone "I don't know" when they ask when my boyfriend is coming home and where he is!

  6. My boyfriend and best friend of 2 years has just gone for the first time, any words of wisdom i feel like nothing i have ever felt before it is like losing a limb please help if you can

  7. I was checking out your page and Submariner's wife caught my eye. While it's been 3 1/2 years since I had to worry about a patrol, I found myself laughing and totally relating to every word. I don't miss the boat smell, count down calendars, or family grams (before email), but I do miss the other wives and the connections I made that only happens in the sub communiity. Wishing you continued strength.

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